Man of the House: Let us all now salute the sacred man cave
Men feel nothing on their face - crumbs, cream cheese, small crustaceans. We have no feeling there, due to years of shaving and getting wind-whipped while ice fishing. Or, the urban equivalent, beaten up by cocktail waitresses.
In any case, men's faces have no functional nerve endings. Ever seen a dude eat a barbecue rib? Men apply barbecue sauce externally, as if exfoliating. Slathering food over ourselves makes us happy, in ways you can trace to the quivery, most feathery parts of the male chromosome.
Same thing with what they call "man caves." A man cave is a place where a man can go so as not to be disturbed. My buddy Peterman has one in his new house in Pasadena. I haven't seen it yet, but that hasn't stopped him from bragging. Like a little Lambeau, he says. The second-most perfect place in the entire world.
Jeesh, just rub my pretty face in it, why don't you.
I have another buddy - you can never have too many, as it increases your odds of having a good one - who put this great addition on the house, with bedrooms, a master bath and a movie theater that seats a dozen people, its snack bar and "Carrie"-red carpeting like you see in real movie houses.
Know what he's most proud of? Beneath it all is a rudimentary little basement that is all his. Bunker-like and smelling of freshly poured concrete, it is the kind of place where Hitler died.
Down there, my buddy has his own chair. A little TV. Because there are spiders, no one else in the family wants to visit him. I think he bought the spiders at the spider store, raised them from eggs, just to be sure there would be enough.
Me, the world is my man cave, but I have a little basement for emergencies, such as snoozy Saturday afternoons when I just want to be left alone. Being left alone is almost a fetish for men and, when you consider all the other fetishes we have, perhaps our most endearing.
In his new book, the comedian and social commentator Paul Reiser does a fine bit on guys just wanting a chair of their own - one stinking place to sit in a house full of designer couches and just-the-right-lampshades. It harks to the days when men were kings. About 450 years ago.
The other day, I put a chair out in the park - lousy lawn chair, on sale at Sears. Soon, I was surrounded by people, but that was OK because turns out there was a free concert coming up that night and, obviously, I am drawn to free things of almost zero value: T-shirts, coffee mugs, energy drinks.
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The show seemed too literal, as a rope print on shirts underscored the message, but silvered pants were a more subtle suggestion of sunlight on water. For all the importance of sportswear in current men's fashion, there is still a feeling at this house
Soon, I was surrounded by people, but that was OK because turns out there was a free concert coming up that night and, obviously, I am drawn to free things of almost zero value: T-shirts, coffee mugs, energy drinks. On this night, the people I live

So when Orchid, the men's cancer charity I support, asked if I wanted to join its fund-raising trek to the ancient city in Peru, I didn't hesitate. At school I enjoyed history and I've always had an interest in other cultures but this trip turned out
Displayed are a century of nightgowns, men's night shirts, pajamas, robes and bed linens. Also there are alarm clocks, patterns for sewing your own gowns and pajamas and an array of night caps from the time when no proper lady or gentleman would go to

I'm speaking, of course, about Thursday's night's Guardsmen Bachelor Auction at Ruby Skye. The Guardsmen, if you're unfamiliar, is a Bay Area men's group that raises money for poor kids while high-fiving each other a lot and throwing parties at Ruby
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